'Pizza Slice,' Sung to the Tune of Lady Gaga's 'Poker Face'

Reaching in to the Slice mailbag, we've got ...

Lady Gaga in an imagined pizza dress. [Illustration: dump.fm]

Adam,
Singing along to Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" one evening while making pizza I absentmindedly changed the chorus to "Pizza Face." The image brought me up short with disgust, as you can imagine, but there seemed potential in the idea of a pizza parody of the song.

I admit I availed myself of artistic license, and although NYC pizza is mentioned I think of the song as about pizza in general not just NY pizza.

Anyway, here it is; I hope you like it.

—drbubbles

drbubbles,
"I hope you like it?"

"Like it?!?!"

I LOVE IT. ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT. Slice'rs, click through for the lyrics. Someone with some music chops needs to make a YouTube version stat.

"Pizza Slice" (by Lady Gaga and me)

(nom nom nom nom)
(nom nom nom nom)
(nom nom nom nom)
(nom nom nom nom)
(nom nom nom nom)

I wanna fold 'em like they do in NYC (hey)
Big and soft and greasy is the way it ought to be (I love it)
Put the pepperoni and some mushrooms on to start
And right before it's cooked I want some olives on each part

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
First bake it hot, then slice what you've got
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
First bake it hot, then slice what you've got

Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)

p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)

You got to roll it out as thin as it can be (hey)
I mostly like the toppings but not anchovy (I hate it)
Sausage is delish and it goes well with onion
And if you did it right the cheese is gooey when it's done (done)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
First bake it hot, then slice what you've got
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
First bake it hot, then slice what you've got

Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)

p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)

(nom nom nom nom)

I don't want no pie with Fritos,
or burritos,
I'm not lickin' any chicken
off my fingers, and falafel is so really awful
Don't want no chicken on a big bun
Or a frankfurter or hamburger
'Cause sandwiches, sandwiches
Just don't scratch out my food itches

Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)
Can't eat my can't eat my
No you can't eat my pizza slice
(Not sharing with nobody)

p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(not sharing with nobody)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)
p-p-p-pizza slice p-p-pizza slice
(nom nom nom nom)